If there’s one universal truth about Christmas, it’s that moms are the unsung heroes of the season. From orchestrating family traditions to ensuring everyone has the perfect gift (yes, even for that one uncle who “doesn’t need anything”), moms pour their heart into making the holidays magical. So, what happens when moms wake up to an empty stocking on Christmas morning? Spoiler alert: It’s not magical.
The empty stocking phenomenon—a.k.a. #StockingGate—is taking over TikTok and Reddit, bringing to light the silent sacrifice of moms everywhere. And honestly, it’s giving us a little whiplash between laughter and a sad, knowing nod.
What’s the Big Deal About an Empty Stocking?
In a now-viral TikTok, Utah mom Aubree Jones revealed her stocking had been empty for 10 years. Yes, you read that right—a whole decade. Meanwhile, her husband, kids, and even the family dog were living their best lives with stuffed-to-the-brim stockings. The video sparked outrage, empathy, and a collective “Girl, SAME!” from moms everywhere.
@whataboutaub Here’s your yearly reminder! #stockinggate It took @whataboutjoshjones 10 years to learn it was his job 😂 Last year we did a poll abd 7/10 women either fill their own stocking or wake up to an empty one. Let’s change that this year! #christmas #stocking #alliwantforchristmas #momlife #empty #family #viral #husband #husbandandwife #stockingstuffers #dadfail #howtotrainyourhusband #funny #merrychristmas #christmasshopping #throwbackthursday #blackfriday #cybermonday #fyp ♬ Christmas - neozilla
As one TikTok user commented, “The little girl in her felt so left out.” Another added, “This literally broke my heart.” The online conversation quickly turned into a broader discussion about emotional labor and the unbalanced burden moms often carry during the holidays.
Emotional Labor: The Unseen Stocking-Stuffer
Here’s the thing: Moms aren’t just buying gifts; they’re managing the entire holiday experience. Experts like Emma Shandy Anway point out that moms often bear the “mental load,” which includes planning gifts, scheduling events, and even anticipating everyone’s needs weeks in advance.
Let’s not forget, moms are doing all this while working, parenting, and (maybe) sleeping. The result? A Christmas morning where everyone is delighted—except the person who made it all happen.
The Reddit Reality Check
The internet is full of moms sharing their own empty stocking stories, and honestly, they hit harder than a stale fruitcake.
One Reddit user shared:
“I took all four of my kids shopping and let them pick out gifts for each other, my husband, and me. My stocking will be empty because I am not filling it.”
Another mom admitted:
“I was the one buying and wrapping my own presents for years. My kids grew up thinking it was normal for mom to do it all.”
And then there are the success stories—like the mom whose kids filled her stocking with random trinkets like a used toothbrush and Halloween candy. Sure, it wasn’t Pinterest-perfect, but the thought counted more than anything.
How #StockingGate Reflects Bigger Issues
The empty stocking isn’t just about forgotten gifts. It’s a symptom of larger societal norms where moms are expected to do it all while expecting nothing in return.
Marriage and family therapist Anway explains:
“It’s not just about the gifts. It’s the emotional labor of constantly thinking of others and putting yourself last.”
This imbalance can lead to burnout and resentment, especially during a season that’s supposed to be joyful.
How Can We Fix This?
So, what’s the solution? It’s not about grand gestures (though we wouldn’t say no to a spa day). It’s about mindfulness and equality in holiday planning.
1. Communicate Clearly
If you’re tired of waking up to an empty stocking, say so. Let your partner and family know what you need. As one TikTok mom said:
“I told my husband it’s his job now. He filled it with thoughtful goodies, and it made my whole Christmas.”
2. Share the Load
Christmas magic doesn’t have to fall on one person’s shoulders. Delegate tasks like shopping, wrapping, and decorating to other family members.
3. Teach the Next Generation
Kids learn from what they see. Include them in holiday prep and emphasize the importance of giving back to everyone in the family, including mom.
4. Celebrate Yourself
This might sound cliché, but don’t wait for someone else to make you feel special. Buy yourself that stocking stuffer you’ve been eyeing or take time for a little self-care amid the chaos.
The Bottom Line
The empty stocking is more than a holiday faux pas—it’s a wake-up call. Moms deserve to feel appreciated, especially after carrying the weight of everyone else’s joy. Whether it’s a thoughtful gift, a handwritten note, or just a heartfelt “thank you,” let’s make sure every mom knows she’s seen and valued this Christmas.
Because at the end of the day, the best gift we can give is a little empathy—and maybe a stocking full of her favorite snacks.